Reflections as a Pet Hospice Caregiver

Reflections as a Pet Hospice Caregiver
Doing the best I could with what I knew then, and learning how to do better next time
By Allison Hudock, Longtime Cat Mom and Pet Hospice Advocate

From Foster Mom to Foster Failing in the Best Way

My beloved cat Peaches came to me in 2021 as a 10-year-old foster plucked from the shelter by a dedicated New Jersey senior cat rescue, Dutchie and Renee. I kept her shelter name because it was perfectly fitting—she was truly a peach and pure love.

Photo caption: Peaches, Allison's cat, posing for the camera in a bright pink crochet sombrero.

Peaches became my steadfast companion during the COVID-19 pandemic, sitting on my lap while I worked from home and even making appearances in my video calls. When potential adopters showed interest and later backed out, the thought of her leaving was unbearable. I officially adopted her in 2022, and I then became part of the club of foster parents who “fail” in the best way possible. In this post, I share Peaches’ story and my attempt at pet hospice and palliative care and lessons learned. My hope is that other families navigating animal end-of-life comfort care know they are not alone.

The “C” Word: Facing the Unimaginable

In April 2023, Peaches’ belly wasn’t feeling right. At first, I thought it was stress from our cross-country move, but diagnostics in June revealed elevated white blood cells and an abdominal mass. Emergency surgery confirmed advanced small-cell gastrointestinal lymphoma.

I was devastated. None of my cats had ever had cancer. I was angry that it hadn’t been found sooner and overwhelmed by a diagnosis that felt impossible to process.

Choosing Hospice Care For My Cat Without a Plan

After Peaches’ veterinary oncology consult, I learned about her chemotherapy options and prognosis with or without treatment. I quickly realized that comfort and pet quality of life were my priorities for Peaches. I chose pet hospice at home, but at the time, I didn’t really know what animal hospice and palliative care meant in real-time, and how our journey would unfold.

Despite my reliance on veterinary professionals, no one guided me through the process of what hospice care for cats looks like day to day. I discovered that navigating pet hospice and euthanasia without support is isolating and draining, which is extremely unfair to caregivers. This is why it’s imperative that pet end-of-life conversations must be initiated, for starters, and earlier the better—ideally at diagnosis—so families understand what pet hospice is and how it is best implemented for their beloved companion.

Pet Caregiver Stress and Burden: Naming the Reality

Like many pet parents with a strong human-animal bond, I constantly asked myself: Am I doing enough? Am I doing it right? That uncertainty fueled my stress, anxiety, and inadequacy as a caregiver. These are some of the many components of what researchers call Pet Caregiver Burden.

With the benefit of time and hindsight, I’ve come to realize through this experience that acknowledging caregiver burden is not a sign of weakness, nor does it mean that I saw Peaches as a burden because that was certainly not the case - I loved her so much that I was willing to sacrifice so much for her - it was her before me because our human-animal bond was so strong. I now understand that our good intentions are not always achievable or sustainable.

While it is difficult to do while you’re emotional, it is crucial for pet parents/caregivers to evaluate the financial, time commitment, and other resources required to provide the necessary caretaking as the pets’ condition progresses. It’s also important for vet professionals, animal hospice practitioners and others in the orbit to be sensitive to the pet parent’s situation, which can affect their caregiving capabilities.

Honoring Peaches Through Action

On November 6, 2023, I said goodbye to Peaches through euthanasia-assisted death. The experience felt like I had fallen off a treadmill going a thousand miles an hour. As I processed the loss and gravity of the past months, I recognized the many gaps in caregiver support, communication, and referral resources that could have made her pet hospice journey smoother.

Inspired by Peaches, I connected with Michelle Nichols and the AHELP Project (Animal Hospice, End of Life, and Palliative Care Project). Through her, I learned about the Animal Hospice Group’s Certified Animal Hospice Practitioner (CAHP) program. Today, I am pursuing certification to advocate for families, reduce caregiver burden, and ensure the accessibility of pet hospice services.

Learning, Loving, and Leading Forward

The hospice journey with Peaches opened my eyes to the gaps in end-of-life care and taught me so many valuable lessons about life, death, love, caregiving, and gratitude. Since her passing, in my quest to become more educated on pet hospice care, I connected with Michelle Nichols on LinkedIn, and we shared our personal stories of love and loss of our beloved pets. Michelle explained the Animal Hospice Group (AHG) Animal Hospice Practitioner Certification and its benefits for advancing my mission through becoming a Certified Animal Hospice Practitioner (CAHP).

With Peaches as my guiding light, I’m currently pursuing the AHG’s Animal Hospice Certification to ensure pet families are seen, heard, and supported during their hospice care journey.

I share Peaches’ story to spark conversation, promote education within the animal care community, reduce the stigma around pet caregiver stress, and help families know they are not alone. If you are navigating pet hospice at home or wondering about in-home pet hospice near you, know that support exists.

To honor Peaches, I strive to ensure every pet parent can access compassionate animal end-of-life comfort care. I welcome all those interested in advancing this conversation to connect with me, Allison Hudock, through LinkedIn.